The wife checked her husband’s phone and found these names:
‘The tender one’
‘The amazing one’
‘Lady of my dreams,
She got angry and called the first number to find out that was his mother.
Then she called the second number to which his sister replied.
When she dialed the third number her own phone rang.
She cried until her eyes got swollen because she had doubted her innocent husband,
so she gave him her whole month’s salary to make up for it.
Husband took the money and bought a gift for his girlfriend whose name was saved as
‘Uncle Mike the mechanic’
LOVED THIS ? HERE ARE FEW MORE JOKES LIKE THIS:
1. The Blanket Bandit
Mike always hogged the covers until Liz discovered his secret: he’d tie them to the bedposts like a pirate’s treasure—then pretend he lost them at sea. One night, she swapped his pillow for a stuffed parrot. Mike woke to “Pieces of eight!” squawked in his ear. He leapt up in panic, forgetting the blanket was gone. Liz stretched luxuriously under the sheets and whispered, “Shiver me timbers, you cold-hearted man!” ☠️
2. The Snore Scorekeeper
Every evening, Carla graded Tom’s snores on a one‑to‑ten scale—one for a soft sigh, ten for a freight‑train roar. One night he hit twelve, a new personal record. She grabbed a notepad and awarded three bonus points for duration. Tom jolted awake to find “13/10, needs improvement!” scribbled on his forehead with lipstick. He blinked, mumbled, “I demand a recount,” and promptly fell silent—forever. Carla winked and muttered, “Perfect score!”
3. The Midnight Snack Heist
When Sara tip‑toed to the fridge for her midnight chocolate, she found Mark already there in his PJs, snacking on celery sticks. Shocked, she hissed, “You eat that stuff voluntarily?” He shrugged, crumbs on his shirt, “I’m on a diet—just carbo‑stealing for you.” Sara rolled her eyes and hid her candy behind the milk. He caught her hand mid‑reach. “You can’t snack without me,” he proclaimed, “this is a joint operation.”
4. The Alarm Clock Standoff
Jack’s alarm went off at 5:30 a.m., and he banged it off the nightstand—again. Ann punched it back on. He slapped it down. She pressed snooze. Their morning battle turned into a pillow fight. Finally the clock slid off the table, soared across the room, and pinged off the wall. As it rebounded onto Jack’s face, Ann declared victoriously, “Snooze: 1, You: 0!” ⏰
5. The Pillow Fort Truce
Ashley and Ryan built rival pillow forts on either side of the bed: hers pink and floral, his black and leather. Nightly negotiations over a shared blanket became their peace talks. One evening they merged their forts into a pillow palace, complete with fairy lights. Ryan emerged from the fluff, crowned with a pillowcase, and announced, “Long live Queen Ash-Ryan!” They collapsed laughing, vowing walls no more.
6. The “Cuddle or Not” Debate
Jenny craved a cuddle; Dan needed personal space. They devised a complicated cuddle‑meter: green for go, red for “back off,” amber for “five‑minute snuggle.” One night, Dan flipped it to amber at 2 a.m., and Jenny hopped away in disappointment. He awoke alone, the meter glowing red. Groggy, he reset it to green—only to find Jenny back, arms open. “Meter broken,” she whispered.
7. The Footsie Ambush
Under the sheets, Chris played footsie; Megan ignored him until she slipped on his sock. He yelped, and she sprang upright. He stifled laughter as she hopped on one foot. “Are you okay?” he asked sweetly. She hissed, “My arch nemesis!” He offered his other sock as a peace offering. She accepted—and the two socks became a nocturnal handshake.
8. The “Who Snored?” Investigation
After a legendary snore that rattled the windows, Adam and Bella set up a “snore cam.” They replayed the footage in the morning—only to see Bella’s mouth wide open in silence. Adam sat up, confused. “It was you,” he accused. Bella checked her lips: no toothpaste. “False positive,” she retorted, “the snore cam needs recalibration!” ️♀️
9. The Electric Blanket Shock
Eager for warmth, Lisa turned on the electric blanket—only to receive a jolt. She yelped and grabbed the remote; Paul peeked over the covers. He’d hidden the cord under his pillow as a prank. She unplugged it in revenge, leaving him shivering in the cold. He emerged, teeth chattering, and offered his arms as a human blanket. She smiled and said, “Touché, dear.” ⚡
10. The “Bedtime Story” Mix‑Up
Carl loved to read bedtime stories to Eva—but accidentally opened his tax return booklet one night. He recited deductions and Section 179 in soothing tones. Eva drifted off between depreciation schedules. He realized his mistake when she drooled on page 5. He slammed it shut and pulled out a fairy tale. “Much more magical,” he whispered. She mumbled, “Can we talk refunds tomorrow?”
11. The Temperature Treaty
At 2 a.m., Zoe cranked the AC down to freezer mode; Nick woke in a parka. He cranked it up to desert temp; she found him panting and sweaty. They dialed the thermostat like it was a UN climate summit. Finally, they agreed on 72°F—just right. They high‑fived in the dark and snuggled under a single sheet. Peace. ️
12. The Pajama Swap
In a rush one morning, Doug grabbed what he thought was his pajama top—but it was Elaine’s pink floral nightshirt. He went to work as “Mr. Bloom” until he realized. Elaine loudly announced his fashion faux pas at dinner. He shrugged, “It’s vintage chic.” She handed him a plain tee, and he conceded the runway.
13. The Toothpaste Tango
One night, Sam discovered the toothpaste cap missing and assumed Julia used his supply. She found him angrily squeezing a new tube under the sheets. She slid out, grabbed his old cap, and slapped it on. He blinked, realizing he’d been outsmarted. She patted his back and said, “Brushing negotiations concluded.”
14. The Morning Mirror Mess
Allison and Peter used the same bathroom mirror for morning routines. One day, she wrote “I love you” in lipstick on his side. He replied in shaving cream on hers: “I owe you coffee.” They woke to each other’s messages and laughed. They both realized they’d forgotten their toothbrushes. They shared one and kissed.
15. The Bedtime Playlist War
Brenda loved lullabies; Carl craved rock ballads. They compiled a shared playlist—only to discover each track replaced by the other’s picks. Their phone alarms clashed at 11 p.m. to “Rock You like a Hurricane.” Brenda unplugged the speaker; Carl unplugged the headphones. They settled on white noise—in stereo.
16. The Nightlight Negotiation
Todd insisted on a nightlight; Sophia despised it. They compromised with a dim glow. One night, Sophia covertly swapped the bulb for a strobe light. Todd woke in a disco hallucination. He yanked out the bulb and emerged blinking. “Rave’s over,” Sophia announced. He grinned and proposed earplugs for her next glitter bomb.
17. The Under‑Blanket Casino
Every evening, Tim hid quarters under the blanket to test if Linda would notice when he “borrowed” them for morning coffee. One day, she smashed his piggy bank under the covers. He woke to rolling coins. She shrugged, “Gambler’s debt.” They split the haul and invested in breakfast pastries.
18. The Pillow Talk Prank
Mark recorded his voice saying “I love you” on a pillow speaker. Beth lay down, expecting romance—and instead heard him snoring. She flipped the switch off and texted him: “Please record me a lullaby next time.” He rewound, smiled, and happily spooned her the next night.
19. The Blanket Fort Confessions
Locked in a blanket fort, Rachel and Jason declared it “confessional territory.” Jason admitted he’d eaten the last donut; Rachel confessed she’d lost his socks. They traded the misdeeds, laughed, then discovered the fort had collapsed. They crawled out into the scattered bedding, promising to keep secrets elsewhere.
20. The Sheets of Irony
Pat insisted on crisp, starched sheets; Amy loved them soft and thread‑bare. One day, she doused his corner in fabric softener. Pat woke in a sinkhole of fluff. He responded by washing her side with starch. They met in the middle—60/40 starch blend. “Balance achieved,” Amy declared. ️
21. The Midnight Confession
Wendy slipped a note into Bob’s pajama pocket: “I’m the one who ate your leftovers.” He read it at 3 a.m. and scribbled back: “Worth confessing—could use more taco crumbs.” He delivered a fresh foil‑wrapped taco at dawn. She answered with a kiss and an extra hot sauce packet.
22. The Electric Razor Fiasco
George used the electric razor in bed because “the light’s better.” Elaine tripped on the cord in her sleep. George woke to the whirring blade inches from his face. He pulled the plug and declared them blade‑free zones. Elaine issued a “cord‑management” directive—and they both laughed.
23. The Snuggle Calculator
Pam created a spreadsheet logging nightly snuggle durations. Dan balked at column headings: “Lap for lap,” “Warmth index,” “Cuddle coefficient.” He printed it out and framed it above the bed. Pam pointed at the “Hug ROI” cell and whispered, “Highest return ever.” They hugged accordingly.
24. The Bedtime Snack Bribe
Marco bribed Sandra to stay in bed with leftover pizza under the pillow. She found it and marched to the kitchen—only to discover he’d hidden a fresh slice behind her plate. They negotiated toppings and finally shared a midnight slice. “Best deal ever,” Sandra sighed.
25. The Half‑Light Handoff
Claire hated the bright ceiling lamp; Dave refused floor lamps. They rigged a dim table lamp to hang off the bedpost. One night, it tipped and fell. Dave caught it with his foot. Claire applauded his reflexes, and they agreed on a swiveling bedside sconce.
26. The Late‑Night Meeting
Lily emailed Ben to join a midnight meeting in bed. He rolled over with his laptop, expecting work—only to find her playing a trivia game. He played along until she shouted, “You lost!” He tossed the laptop aside and said, “Now that’s teamwork.”
27. The Sleep‑Text Surprise
Nick sent sleepy emojis and “I love you” via text while half‑asleep. Emma awoke to 42 messages: hearts, kisses, and “Did you just drool?” She replied, “Yes—and I love you more.” He groggily texted back, “Meeting adjourned.”
28. The Mattress Shift
Over time, their old mattress developed a dip under Jen’s side. Max hopped to her side to share the crater. She nudged him off. He moved to the center. She pushed him right. Finally, they both rolled to the middle and embraced the slope. “Gravity cuddles,” they called it. ️
29. The Sleep Number Blues
Todd and Kelly bought a split Sleep Number bed so each could pick firmness. Todd went 70; Kelly chose 30. They spent nights switching sides to test extremes, then agreed 50/50. They settle on 47/53 now—because compromise still needs room to wiggle.
30. The Electric Massage
Dan surprised Mia with a handheld massager under the sheets. She screamed as it buzzed at full power. Dan apologized profusely—while giggling. She smacked him with the pillow, and they both collapsed in laughter. Next time, he promised a manual massage with deep sincerity.
31. The Dream Recorder
Claire claimed she had a nightmare. Greg “recorded” her dream on his phone in bullet points. She read it back and laughed: “You missed the part about the flying zucchini.” He scratched his head and said, “That’s going in the bloopers reel.”
32. The Pillow Swap
Liam loved his soft down pillow; Emma preferred firm. One night, she swapped them in the dark. He woke gasping, eyebrows raised. She snuck back her pillow. Next morning, both claimed theirs had flipped—and they shared a surprised grin.
33. The Bedroom DJ
Phil insisted on classical piano to fall asleep; Nora craved whale songs. They built a playlist that alternated movements and sonar beeps. It lulled them both—until the file glitched and looped Beethoven’s Fifth thirty times. They woke to their own symphony, then turned off the speaker in unison.
34. The Silence Pledge
After a midnight argument, Zoe and Mark pledged a “silent bed.” They communicated via exaggerated eyebrow raises and interpretive dance only. By dawn, they’d choreographed a full routine—then collapsed in laughter and broke the silence with coffee.
35. The Temperature Tolerance Test
Every month they tested how long each could endure the other’s side of the bed: one side freezing, the other boiling. They timed themselves, then swapped positions. Last one standing got breakfast in bed. They gave up after two weeks—preferring actual food to a win.
36. The Phone‑Free Zone
Samantha declared the bed phone‑free at lights‑out; Dean hid his under the pillow. She discovered 3 a.m. “urgent notifications.” She swapped it for a dictionary. He awoke to “lexicon full.” He surrendered his screen and joined her book reading.
37. The Late‑Night Confession
In bed, Laura whispered a secret: “I ate your gummy bears.” Matt paused and whispered back: “Then I owe you ten.” She raised an eyebrow; he produced a string of candies. They divided them fairly and dozed off.
38. The Blanket Fort Revenge
Victor built a massive blanket fort around his side of the bed. Hannah smirked, patched it with duct tape to trap him inside. He cheered as he burst out, “Victory!” She tossed him a pillow and said, “Truce?”
39. The Pillowcase Exchange
James replaced Claire’s pillowcase with a novelty print saying “World’s Best Napper.” She woke to a photo op—then slipped it off in indignation. He apologized with a heart‑shaped one. She kept it—and wore it with pride.
40. The Sleepover Decision
One night, overflow guests forced them to share a twin mattress. They plotted a game of “floor‑bed Tetris,” negotiating space. They ended up half on the twin, half on the rug—and laughed until dawn at their cramped ingenuity.
41. The Duo Snore Machine
They rigged soft pillows under each snorer to muffle noise—but the pillows squeaked. They upgraded to ear plugs—then realized the squeak was the pillows rubbing. They surrendered to ear muffs and contented silence.
42. The “Turn the Page” Battle
At bedtime, Alice read aloud—Bob turned pages too fast. She boomed, “Slow down!” He retorted, “I don’t want spoilers!” They compromised at page eight, agreed to alternate turns. Now they race to page ten before lights out.
43. The Cold Spot Mystery
Every night, Ben reported a “cold spot” under the sheets. Claire insisted it was paranormal. She set up a handheld heater suspiciously under her side. He caught her and they both froze—then lit candles and declared it “a romantic apparition.”
44. The Flannel vs. Silk Debate
Mel preferred flannel PJs; Josh chose silk. They bought a reversible duvet cover—flannel on one side, silk on the other—and flipped it nightly. It became their ceremonial “flip‑fest,” ending only when they both fell asleep.
45. The Bedtime Face‑Mask
Liz applied a green face‑mask and slid into bed. Mike sprang awake, horrified, thinking Martian invasion. He flicked on the light and shrieked. She dissolved into giggles, peeled off the mask, and he decided he might need one too—just to bond.
46. The Twin‑Sized Conspiracy
Over a weekend, they tested every bed in the house until finding the perfect firmness. They then discovered the guest room mattress—identical to theirs. They swapped them and walked away with smug smiles.
47. The Alarm‑Clock Ambush
Pete rigged their phone alarm under the bed to blast mariachi music. Sue jumped out in panic while maracas shook the frame. She tracked down the culprit—he popped out from under the sheets, tuxedo and trumpet in hand, and serenaded her with “La Cucaracha.”
48. The Pillow‑Fort Exposé
During a power outage, they built a pillow fort and used phone flashlights for storytelling. Mid-story, the fort collapsed and spilled them onto the floor. They laughed so hard they barely noticed the lights had returned. ️
49. The Bedtime Foot War
They played a nightly “foot war”—one tries to tickle, the other to fend off. One squeal later, they declared punked. Now they postpone war until pillow fort is built.
50. The “I’ll Wait Right Here” Pact
Amy swore she’d wait by the bed until Mark returned from a late meeting. He came back—to find her asleep standing up, leaning on the headboard. He gently guided her to bed, whispered, “Pact void—you snooze, you lose,” and kissed her goodnight.
